Brick hits the fan as Emperor slams impotent Caprican regime’s failure to clamp down on media

The Empire of Legoland’s economy has collapsed while refugeefigs flee in their hundreds to the safety of neighbouring countries.

That outlandish tale is being reported under the guise of news by local media outlets in the backwater rogue state that is the Kingdom of the Capricas.

Not surprisingly, Emperor David is an angry minifig. In a rare outburst in recent times, the Emperor severely criticised the Caprican Government for failing to ensure basic standards of journalism were being upheld in the Caprican domestic media.

Addressing the Hall of Minifigs, His Imperial Majesty referenced articles in the Caprican on Sunday newspaper that depicted his Empire as a land in turmoil.

Quotes from well-known subjects of the Empire were “maliciously fabricated” said Emperor David whilst the newspaper’s insinuation that the Legoland state was responsible for the recent burning down of the Caprican embassy was “propaganda”.

Reports of refugeefigs amassing on the borders of Caprica was impossible as “our borders are closed”, confirmed the Emperor to rousing applause. The dictator left for the Winter Palace to a standing ovation from all members of the national parliament.

Deputy Prime Minister Pirus Halliday called on parliamentarians to support a motion for economic sanctions on the Capricas until they shut down their “contaminated” media outlets.