Bad hair day hits nation as first hairdressers opens its doors to minifigs

Vain minifigs, female minifigs, fashion lovers, and general really dead boring figs, are celebrating today after the nation’s first hair salon, 1SizeFitsAllHeads, opened its doors on Grand Avenue Street in the capital today.

The hairdressers, located on the third floor of the new One Stud department store, is run by Ms Boringum Focus and Mr Prosperous Focus.

Speaking to The Legoland Times, Ms Focus explained that hair “is important for minifigs to attract figs of the opposite stud”. “Minifigs are becoming more interested in how they look, especially with the recent influx of immigrants with more distinguished minifigs faces and hairstyles in the last few years”.

Ms Focus denied that looks were not important stressing that “who would want to look like him”, referring to the passing Legoland Football Association president and general overweight lard ass, Mr Fifa. She also expects the new business venture to be a “fantastic success story” and predicted that “all self-respecting minifigs will flock to the outlet”. Questioned about the lack of respectable minifigs in Legoland, Mr Focus rejected the suggestion saying that “there are plenty of good minifigs”.

Haircuts are expected to cost minifig customers between £10 and £20 with richer minifigs expected to be charged more due to their financial background.