The Government has announced that in excess of £100 million Lego pounds will be made available to the military in the next budget, which may be announced in October.
According to the New Brick Order’s Minister for Defence, Chemicalus Prickus, “the Republic needs to improve its military capabilities to defend itself against the increasing threat of foreign aggressors”. Asked who these “foreign aggressors” were, Mr Prickus said, “you know who”.
It is believed that this could mean Plasticland Empire, Playmobil, Treedon, the Blacktron Republic, and approximately 40 other undesirable states.
It is reported that the majority of the £100m will be spent on expanding the Legoland Republican Guard’s armoured tank division and the Military Air Corp. Both areas of the army have come in for criticism recently for being both ill-equipped and unprepared for a major conflict. The LRG and MAC divisions are considered “key” in securing Legoland’s interests, Mr Prickus commented.
The massive allocation of money to the military is expected to hit other areas of the economy hard. In an editorial in the Financial Times of Legoland, the paper states that “the number of Lego basic bricks being imported into the country is likely to decline dramatically”. This could cause an economic recession the paper warns, as the health of construction industry, one of the nation’s largest, relies heavily on the importing of such materials.
The Government recently announced its decision not to go ahead with the funding for a new hydro-electrical dam in Legoland Bay and a new sports stadium in Legoland Town. Plans to make a new road by-pass for the capital city now also appear under threat from today’s announcement.