PM was poisoned with highly radioactive element confirms the Imperial Hospital

File Photo: PM Julian Haliday is gravely ill in hospital after having been poisoned

File Photo: PM Julian Haliday (pictured centre) is gravely ill in the Davidium Imperial Hospital

Prime Minister Haliday was the victim of radioactive poisoning the Davidium Imperial Hospital confirmed this morning. The minifig was diagnosed with acute radiation syndrome by doctors with subsequent testing confirming the ingestion of the chemical element Polonium-210 as the root cause.

It is believed the poison was likely in wine the minifig drank at yesterday evening’s State function in Himble.

The stark news has sent a shudder of fear through the entire Hall of Minifigs and in particular, those within the coalition government itself. A number of junior MPs have resigned their seats and fled to the perceived safety of their constituencies.

Speculation as to who was responsible for the poisoning is rife and has taken hold of the Hall of Minifigs with conspiracy theories widespread.

Deputy PM Marius Hanibal, who has taken over the reigns while Haliday is incapacitated, attempted to instill some composure. Addressing the cabinet, opposition politicians, and the entire Empire, Hanibal requested that all minifigs would stick together in this difficult time.

“As easy as minifigs can be stuck together brick by brick, minifigs can be taken apart brick by brick. One does not require a 630 Brick Separator to do this. It’s happened since the dawn of figs and has happened without separators. When minifigs don’t stick together, when minifigs look distrustfully at one another, minifigs are eventually broken. This is not what we need nor want. It’s in no minifigures interest. We must leave the finger pointing and conspiracies completely aside and wait patiently for a proper scientific explanation”.