In an unannounced state television broadcast, General Amun contended that “dangerous outlaw groups” were emerging that posed “significant threats to all members of the international community”. The menace of these groups was being exacerbated by underlying movements for free voting, minifig rights and the “ideological scourge of equal brick distribution”.
“The time has come to set aside past differences and strike out against these radicals and their radicalised belief systems,” said Amun.
“Groups whose actions and dogmas destabilise entire regions of the globe to further myopic causes are a friend of no minifig and no minifig nation. This message, a message to leaders, should be interpreted as a minifig-leaf to the leaders of all recognised peoples and a proclamation that Legoland is prepared to work in partnership with you to see these groups and these belief systems dismantled.”
Although not explicitly named, the groups are understood to include pro-Classicism, religious and separatist groups that likely include the Legoban, Al-Medahyin and the AIM.
Calling brick poverty “fiction” and proponents of equal brick distribution a root cause for civil unrest, General Amum made it clear that the Empire sees no social responsibility to raise the Piece Per Capita of the poorest minifigs.
“Their poverty is a result of the mistakes they or their forefathers have made. It is therefore not the state’s responsibility to artificially improve their brick ownership”, General Amun explained.
Keen to demonstrate Legoland was acting on its own warning, Amun announced a draft of new security measures were to be implemented with immediate effect to “consolidate minifig safety”.
The wide-ranging measures include the shutting down of a number of “extremist” publications, the introduction of a House Protection Programme for former members of the political establishment, the destruction of former places of God worship, the arrest of proponents of equal brick distribution including prominent EDB and CPL members and expansion of the paramilitary State Defence Legion through a conscription programme.
How the international community reacts to Amun’s call remains to be seen. The offer is being seen by some opponents of the regime however as a clear sign of weakness at the heart of Davidium. Speaking to the Minifig Times under condition of anonymity, a leading academic in the Emperor David University argued that Amun “needs friends not foes”.
“What we have here is Amun trying to muster help from countries who are officially considered enemies of the Empire’s imperial expansionist plans. We know from leaked Ministry of Information documents that this is the case. The regime has been intentionally isolationist in order to avoid over-stretching the military. It is currently weakened by the simple fact that at a grassroots level it is hugely unpopular and is fighting bubbling internal dissent with armed rebellion in Eastern Castleland all whilst brick clicking is being carried out at a snail’s pace. We can only surmise therefore that Amun’s attempt at forming military cooperation is intended solely to continue the regime’s effort to mitigate the Empire’s against external threats whilst the old order is overwhelmed from within. Should this be achieved you will see the true Legoland.”