LFA put franchises on relegation footing as association to rule on reducing size of league

The Legoland Football Association has issued a notice to Serie A’s 24 franchises that the current season may see up to seven clubs relegated with the aim of reducing the number of teams in the national league’s top flight from 24 to 20. A formal decision will be made in May following a review of the Lilac Report.

The announcement has surprised many lay observers of the game but not those close to the corridors of power at Number 10 Blooming Street. It has been known that the expansion of the league from 22 teams to 24 in 2009 irked Legoland FC, the Empire’s biggest and most influential club, into action. The Cartel are understood to have been lobbying for a reversal of the 2009 expansion under the guise that it has lowered the standard of competing teams. LFC have been keen not to draw attention to their true motive, the reapportioning of the prize and television money spoils which are a rich honeypot for the team’s accountants.

Association chief Henry Fifa was less careful yesterday ensuring another day would not pass without another top-notch gaffe. “Less teams means less sharing and more money for the elite and who would argue this isn’t progress?”, a wine induced red-faced Mr Fifa spluttered before attempting to correct his slip of the tongue by concluding, “that’s not to say we’re doing this just for the benefit of big teams”.

Should the reduction go-ahead it would be a huge set-back for a host of Serie A veteran established names such as Ajax Skerries, Emperor Eagles, Port Villa, Republic and Segasonic Snowfalls, all involved in the current relegation dogfight. With 8 games left in the 48 game league campaign, Legoland Town, Ajax Skerries and Atlas Bell looked beyond doomed. Indeed, even if Legoland Town manage to win all of their 8, they still will likely be saying cheerio to top-flight football next season.

For the others, a small glimmer of hope remains. Serie A has always had over 20 teams since the turn of the millennium, with 22 teams competing each season between 2000 and 2009. Whether the LFA will revert to a format last seen in 1999 remains to be seen, but the league’s lesser-weights hope not.

Analysis

It is many minifigs’ well established belief that Legoland FC, more than any other team or body, hold significant power over the policy makers in 10 Blooming Street.

It may be naive to believe that further lining the pockets of a single team is the LFA’s sole or even primary motive for reducing the number of member teams in Serie A.

With rising competition expected from emerging national football leagues in the international arena, most noticeably those of Kilimanlego and Playmobil, the football authorities may be moving to pre-empt the threat from this quarter by beefing up Serie A’s top guns.

Reducing the size of Serie A should increase the quality of the Empire of Legoland’s representatives in the Minifig Gold Cup and thereby help retain Serie A as the recognised Shangri-La of the minifig footballing world.

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