Unemployment figures released today have painted a gloomy picture on the jobs front with official statistics confirming that over 1,100 minifigs are now out of work.
The record number of jobless is overwhelming the nation’s social welfare system run by the State Employment Bureau (SEB2) the government was told today at an impromptu meeting called to discuss the Empire’s deteriorating finances.
SEB2’s regional manager for the capital, Mr Supportus Bumsus, told The Minifig Times that the only realistic ways to reduce the huge numbers was to either undertake massive state construction projects or commence “gladiator fights” and “lion dancing shows” at football grounds throughout the land.
A proposal by the Communist Party to introduce conscription into the military was thrown out by General Secretary Obnoxious Consensus who explained that the army’s ranks were swelling after an additional 400 minifigs enlisted in 2008.
“As the country’s biggest employers, the LRG and other military divisions simply do not need any more resources on the minifig side of things. Such a move would therefore simply replace social welfare payments with army wages and would bankrupt the state”, he said.
Nevertheless all opposition parties in the White House, led by the Legoland Communist Party, have called on Consensus to resign and Bumsus to be sacked.
Particular ire was reserved for Consensus whom opposition politicians are blaming on squandering billions since 2006 on seemingly endless redevelopment of the capital’s government buildings and on the Legoland City monorail system which to this day remains non-operational has which has been described as a “fiasco”, even by some members of New Brick Order.
Others in the NBO are adamant that any blame lies solely and squarely with the civil service employees responsible for managing the state’s finances and reporting to their department heads.
“If we had known that we were running out of cash we could have planned for this last year. The fact that we are now anticipating a deficit in the hundreds of millions for 2009 is not the fault of any member of NBO but rather the average ‘figs on the ground that do the accounting work”, said the controversial Minister for Sports, Education and Drugs, Mr Crazy-us Broadside.