Legoland Stores opens amid chaotic scenes as irate shoppers go berserk

The new store

The opening attracted somewhat overly eager shoppers

The flagship supermarket for the Legoland Stores retail group today opened for business in the Legoland City suburb of Marino however angry shoppers intimidated shop floor staff by cursing and banging on the doors.

The shoppers, who felt they were waiting outside the outlet’s doors too long before Legoland Stores opened its doors, used their fists, feet and suitcases to rattle the nerves of those inside.

When the doors were finally opened at 9.02am, the crowd which had built up surged through, knocking over boxes of cereals and cans of Guinness in the process. One shopper exclaimed, “the shop was supposed to open at 9am!”.

The Managing Director of the shop, Mr Biggus Doofus, claimed later that the incident was a “non-event” and welcomed the shoppers stating that they “weren’t rude”.

According to economic analysts the company has decided to open this branch in Marino in direct competition with arch-rival City News, the Eland owned newsagents. Doofus claimed that this was not the case as “Legoland Stores don’t consider City Minnows competition”.

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